Shikagoland Tweets, Her Timeline Self-Detonates, or: When Keeping It Real Goes Wrong

My feelings on Twitter are basically summed up in this wisdom of the ages:

You take the good, you take the bad, you take them both and there you have The Facts of Life. The facts of life.

Alan Thicke was a prophet.

Whether its live tweeting reality and award shows,  #BlackTwitter dragging Paula Deen, learning all kinds of magic via the dozens of really smart folks I follow, or just talking to my friends, Twitter has my needs covered. I also happen to feel like its my best medium, where my personality comes across best: in 140 character spurts of sarcasm…or expressions of lust for Channing Tatum.

Despite the fact that tweet like I get paid for it (can someone figure out a way to make that happen? kthx) I’m not a person who has thousands of followers. Before this week I was somewhere in the low 300s and I was totally cool with that. Even though my timeline is public, I never worry too much about the things I say being an issue because the people who follow me know very well what I’m about.

Channing Tatum

Just this past weekend I told some friends at brunch (who are the kind of people who have huge followings on Twitter) that I was happy to just be in my little corner prattling away about nothing substantial because I wouldn’t want the headaches of having people trying to argue with me all the time. Which makes what happened to me a few days ago deliciously ironic.

In reaction to things I’ve been seeing in all forms of media I tweeted the following:

Which, at the time I figured to be the very definition of a no duh statement. Very me. A dash of wit with the intentional use of “you people”. One that I followed up with:

and then went on my merry way. I haven’t talked much about the Zimmerman trial anywhere, and I made my feeling on the injustice done to Trayvon Martin in this space last year. Although I’m known to rant, those tweets weren’t part of some larger sentiment. They were just something I was feeling at that moment.

But then all hell broke loose:

I’m not going to dignify the bullshit that got tossed at me by all the racist morons who showed up to put me in my place by posting their tweets here (although the guy that told me to suck a onion sandwich smelling cunt get points for creativity), but lets just say…I pissed off a LOT of people with that incredibly banal tweet. I got called everything but a child of god, received several threats of violence, and was told multiple times that black people are violent mindless thugs and white people are just protecting themselves.

Which, all things considered, is exactly the line if thinking that told George Zimmerman he was doing his civic duty in stalking and murdering a child.

I posted that first tweet sometime Wednesday afternoon and here it is Friday morning and my mentions are still absolute trash. That said, its almost comforting that I’ve only received two types of responses: enthusiastic agreement and vehement disagreement. Too many times when it comes to issues of race, there is always some mealy mouthed wannabe kumbaya jerkface (too much?) who wants to “look at life from both sides now” and meet somewhere in the middle. I really don’t think there are multiple angles at which to look at this issue.

Either you are a racist shitbag or you’re not.

I probably shouldn’t tweet that.

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